Sia
Ok...so it was about 90 degrees outside.. we were at the mall.. aguy came up to me assuming and/or hoping that i spoke spanish.. and explained to me that his car hd no gas and he had money at home but he had no gas to get home and his wife and daughters were in the car waiting.. He offerd to give me his drivers license in return for letting him borrow $5 for gas and he would give me $20 when he got back for letting him use the $5. I personally thought it was ridiculous and would not be able to sleep at night for taking a $15 gain on his "misfortune" so we let him have $5 and that was that... (although it took some convincing on our part to get him to agree... he didnt want something for nothing) Was it wrong of us to help him if we didnt know for sure if he was telling the truth? I dont regret our decision i saw something in his eyes that showed sincerety..but would anyone else had done this?
I wasnt going to stay at the mall with that mans licesnce and wait for him to return.. he wanted to leave collateral but we didnt expect to be triply compensated
He had said he forgot his money at home.. I'm thinking they got to the mall realized the money was at home and then noticed they didnt have enough to get back home.. I am constantly afraid of this happening to me so when i go out i check my wallet repeatedly..(almost obessive compulsive about it) it's severly ironic that his situation was like that.....:)
Answer
its a personal choice Good Q!
i give freely- I have been on both sides. I never want to be repaid, a loan is a burden I don't want to deal with ever.
I was in Colorado on vacation, in a small town, I jumped into the jeep, and drove 20 minutes to the closest (open) store, and upon check out realized that I had forgot my wallet in the hotel room. My husband was their with the baby, and our cell phones were not working too well it was remote.
I had "personal products and a package of diapers". I was so upset, I was OUT of both. I started to cry out of sheer frustration and exahaustion. The woman behind me, with out blinking an eye, said, I will take care of that for you. You go home and take care of that baby, are you okay to do that?
I hugged that stranger and since that day, I often pay for others items out of just "kindness". Its Karma for me.
Its not uncommon to pick a seniors breakfast or lunch at an IHOP or Slide a $20 to the Mc Donalds cashier for a mom with lots of small kids in tow and she looks exhausted.
Sometimes I just buy a round of desserts for a table of people, while I am dining just to see them smile and enjoy being together, just a few minutes longer.
Crisis brings the best out of people, yet you never really hear about that part.... because its "grace" that leads you.
During Katrina, we had hundreds of people here, homeless, scared, Broke and proud strangers. I would see them, just waiting in parking lots with no place to go. I would drop off a box of KFC w/ some fries and large soda or a Bag of Tacos from Taco Bell. I realized a $5 or $10 walmart card was a perfect thing. SO I would purchase $50 worth and drop them in some "burger bags", so each person had a card, so they could get what "they " needed. I actually fed one family for almost two weeks, the mother, was crying one day.... the kids had gone for a walk. She just got news her husband was dead, house destroyed and no reason to go back home. They had not had baths in a week. I went and got them a month pass at the local YMCA for the entire family, so the kids could play/swim and mom could get a shower every day.
About a four months ago, she ran into me.... I did not recongnize her at all. In Walmart, she said that She fell in love with our community and the church folks that helped her, the kids are in school and doing great, they have a good apartment and life was good. She never had to accept the welfare the government offered, the community took such great care of them. So she has made it her personal mission to help others, and the entire family does "Meals on wheels" and " shelter kitchen work" once a week, not to repay any loans or debts....because she was there and knows that pain of hunger.
its a personal choice Good Q!
i give freely- I have been on both sides. I never want to be repaid, a loan is a burden I don't want to deal with ever.
I was in Colorado on vacation, in a small town, I jumped into the jeep, and drove 20 minutes to the closest (open) store, and upon check out realized that I had forgot my wallet in the hotel room. My husband was their with the baby, and our cell phones were not working too well it was remote.
I had "personal products and a package of diapers". I was so upset, I was OUT of both. I started to cry out of sheer frustration and exahaustion. The woman behind me, with out blinking an eye, said, I will take care of that for you. You go home and take care of that baby, are you okay to do that?
I hugged that stranger and since that day, I often pay for others items out of just "kindness". Its Karma for me.
Its not uncommon to pick a seniors breakfast or lunch at an IHOP or Slide a $20 to the Mc Donalds cashier for a mom with lots of small kids in tow and she looks exhausted.
Sometimes I just buy a round of desserts for a table of people, while I am dining just to see them smile and enjoy being together, just a few minutes longer.
Crisis brings the best out of people, yet you never really hear about that part.... because its "grace" that leads you.
During Katrina, we had hundreds of people here, homeless, scared, Broke and proud strangers. I would see them, just waiting in parking lots with no place to go. I would drop off a box of KFC w/ some fries and large soda or a Bag of Tacos from Taco Bell. I realized a $5 or $10 walmart card was a perfect thing. SO I would purchase $50 worth and drop them in some "burger bags", so each person had a card, so they could get what "they " needed. I actually fed one family for almost two weeks, the mother, was crying one day.... the kids had gone for a walk. She just got news her husband was dead, house destroyed and no reason to go back home. They had not had baths in a week. I went and got them a month pass at the local YMCA for the entire family, so the kids could play/swim and mom could get a shower every day.
About a four months ago, she ran into me.... I did not recongnize her at all. In Walmart, she said that She fell in love with our community and the church folks that helped her, the kids are in school and doing great, they have a good apartment and life was good. She never had to accept the welfare the government offered, the community took such great care of them. So she has made it her personal mission to help others, and the entire family does "Meals on wheels" and " shelter kitchen work" once a week, not to repay any loans or debts....because she was there and knows that pain of hunger.
Help with keeping my baby?
Tyler
I just found out that I'm possibly pregnant. I'm turning 21 in October and my boyfriend just turned 19. We are both recovering from drug addictions and taking steps to get our own apartment and start new jobs. With all this going on I'm not sure if it's in the baby's best interest to have the child. I previously had one abortion for medical reasons and after that had a miscarriage.
I don't know how a second abortion would affect me physically and mentally. It was very hard to do the first time. I had nightmares and regrets but it was for the better
This time I want to do what I have to do and take responsibility for my actions. I'm willing to do whatever it takes if I have this baby however we have been debating the abortion as well
After talking about it with him I can tell that he would rather terminate the pregnancy (it would only be about 4 weeks old) but I don't know if I can bring myself to do it again. It seems like the easy way out and it also breaks my heart to lose a 3rd child
So to end the stress I told him to not worry about it and don't bring it up anymore. Then he proceeds to tell me that he would still like to come with me to planned parenthood (I guess he was assuming by my statement that I was going to have the abortion) but I wasn't.... I was planning to get all my stuff together and prepare for the baby.
The only reason he thinks of keeping it is bcus of my past. I feel like he wants an abortion but I can't do it.
Any advice???
Answer
A new start away from all the people that you used to get high with should really help out. You could move and then start hanging out with a different kind of people. I don't know if you are religious but church is a great way to start and no one will know your past till after they have known you if you choose to reveal it. Some areas of the country have rent at less than 1/8th the price of other areas of the country for example Springfield Missouri can cast as little as $385.00 a month versus $4,000.00 a month for a one bedroom in San Francisco. You can get an all inclusive for $600.00 a month in Springfield Missouri leaving you with your cellphone bill, groceries and transportation payments. If you need help Medicaid and WIC and SNAP and other stuff are all available. The income is lower but so is the cost of living. I am way better off here making $24,000.00 a year using less than a quarter of my income on rent than I would be in San Francisco making $100,000.00 a year paying about half my income in rent. What you need to start out is what it takes to go camping you can add on as you have the money. Moving stuff costs a lot of money so make a list of all your essentials (clothes hairbrush and such) buy a bus ticket and move out here. There is plenty of employment. Then Spend $200.00 on a Walmart Mattress buy some sheet sets and blankets and a pot and plates and forks and stuff and buy more as you get more. In the mean time if you want to entertain do it in a public park or at a restaurant where everyone gets separate checks and in a few years you will be on your feet and ready to move into a better place with better stuff. For those whose parents don't pay the way and choose to stay out of debt life is not glamorous but debt is far from glamorous too. Missouri state costs $8,000.00 a year for in-state tuition and head start for 6 week old's and up only costs $55.00 a week. This is totally doable. Find someone who can teach you how to shop and what you need. Go to the woman who brought a bag lunch to the park for her toddler not the lady in designer clothes.
Your total cost in the Springfield Missouri area will be
$0.00 in medicaid for the year if you qualify and apply or approximately $5,750.00 per year for insurance through an employer that uses united plus any co-payments.
$2,915.00 a year in daycare for head start if you apply, qualify and get in.
$1,000.00 a year in diapers and wipes based on 8-12 diapers a day and .16 a diaper aldi's brand and .02 a wipe (wal mart brand) if you have a washer you can go cloth when the baby is not in daycare and cut your cost by half.
Hit up the bag sales at the red rack thrift stores and you can cloth a kid for $20.00 a year if you leave room for growing and only buy 10 sets per size per season and buy ahead and go with layers. Never buy new and never spend more than the quarter the cost of a new item on a used item.
$10.00 for a thrift store pack and play
$40.00 for two yard sale car seats (not past their expiration date)
$20.00 for a craig's list stroller.
$50.00 a week on groceries but you have to know how to cook and bake. $2,650.00 for the year
and $60.00 a year in cell phone costs.
Entertainment is optional.
$11,510.00 total living expenses (I am assuming you are going with the medicaid option because the cost of insurance is through the roof). So you and need to make lets say at least $15,000.00 a year (1,250 a month or $283.00 a week) to cover miscellaneous expenses if you lived in an all inclusive apartment in the Springfield Missouri area walking and using public transit and head start and medicaid. Less if you factor in WIC and stuff. If you make more you can save to get more furniture and move to a better place and buy a car and go to college a few years down the road. This is totally doable.
WIC will cover breast pumps for working mothers and students or formula for those who can't produce milk.
As long as you keep your baby cared for, healthy, clean, dry, warm, clothed, rested and fed it doesn't matter how you do it. I use baking soda and water instead of baby shampoo because it is less irritating to the eyes and the baby still smells fresh and clean. Do what you have to but you and this baby are going to make it an be independent. You will be a fully mature adult making her own way in the world and when you are well off financially remember your roots and give back to those who are in need as you were.
A new start away from all the people that you used to get high with should really help out. You could move and then start hanging out with a different kind of people. I don't know if you are religious but church is a great way to start and no one will know your past till after they have known you if you choose to reveal it. Some areas of the country have rent at less than 1/8th the price of other areas of the country for example Springfield Missouri can cast as little as $385.00 a month versus $4,000.00 a month for a one bedroom in San Francisco. You can get an all inclusive for $600.00 a month in Springfield Missouri leaving you with your cellphone bill, groceries and transportation payments. If you need help Medicaid and WIC and SNAP and other stuff are all available. The income is lower but so is the cost of living. I am way better off here making $24,000.00 a year using less than a quarter of my income on rent than I would be in San Francisco making $100,000.00 a year paying about half my income in rent. What you need to start out is what it takes to go camping you can add on as you have the money. Moving stuff costs a lot of money so make a list of all your essentials (clothes hairbrush and such) buy a bus ticket and move out here. There is plenty of employment. Then Spend $200.00 on a Walmart Mattress buy some sheet sets and blankets and a pot and plates and forks and stuff and buy more as you get more. In the mean time if you want to entertain do it in a public park or at a restaurant where everyone gets separate checks and in a few years you will be on your feet and ready to move into a better place with better stuff. For those whose parents don't pay the way and choose to stay out of debt life is not glamorous but debt is far from glamorous too. Missouri state costs $8,000.00 a year for in-state tuition and head start for 6 week old's and up only costs $55.00 a week. This is totally doable. Find someone who can teach you how to shop and what you need. Go to the woman who brought a bag lunch to the park for her toddler not the lady in designer clothes.
Your total cost in the Springfield Missouri area will be
$0.00 in medicaid for the year if you qualify and apply or approximately $5,750.00 per year for insurance through an employer that uses united plus any co-payments.
$2,915.00 a year in daycare for head start if you apply, qualify and get in.
$1,000.00 a year in diapers and wipes based on 8-12 diapers a day and .16 a diaper aldi's brand and .02 a wipe (wal mart brand) if you have a washer you can go cloth when the baby is not in daycare and cut your cost by half.
Hit up the bag sales at the red rack thrift stores and you can cloth a kid for $20.00 a year if you leave room for growing and only buy 10 sets per size per season and buy ahead and go with layers. Never buy new and never spend more than the quarter the cost of a new item on a used item.
$10.00 for a thrift store pack and play
$40.00 for two yard sale car seats (not past their expiration date)
$20.00 for a craig's list stroller.
$50.00 a week on groceries but you have to know how to cook and bake. $2,650.00 for the year
and $60.00 a year in cell phone costs.
Entertainment is optional.
$11,510.00 total living expenses (I am assuming you are going with the medicaid option because the cost of insurance is through the roof). So you and need to make lets say at least $15,000.00 a year (1,250 a month or $283.00 a week) to cover miscellaneous expenses if you lived in an all inclusive apartment in the Springfield Missouri area walking and using public transit and head start and medicaid. Less if you factor in WIC and stuff. If you make more you can save to get more furniture and move to a better place and buy a car and go to college a few years down the road. This is totally doable.
WIC will cover breast pumps for working mothers and students or formula for those who can't produce milk.
As long as you keep your baby cared for, healthy, clean, dry, warm, clothed, rested and fed it doesn't matter how you do it. I use baking soda and water instead of baby shampoo because it is less irritating to the eyes and the baby still smells fresh and clean. Do what you have to but you and this baby are going to make it an be independent. You will be a fully mature adult making her own way in the world and when you are well off financially remember your roots and give back to those who are in need as you were.
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Title Post: Do you think we did the right thing by giving the stranger money?
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Thanks For Coming To My Blog
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