lunch bags for men canada image
275
(Not my riddles. Taken from a book.)
A lady working the border of Canada and the Uninted staes, got a call stating a potential terrorist might have gotten through, during her work hours. She only inspected three people that day as the crossed the border. Some coming into Canada, some going out. He was said to be caucasion and male. She thuroghly inspected these three "crossers". One pale man was crossing, and she saw a ski pole in the back. He told her he had been hiking in new Hampshire. She let him go. Another car cam with a man and woman, and the man had a moustache and dirty hands. (Which is what the suspect looked like.) They claimed to have been changing their tires, because they had a flat. She saw a tire in the car, and let them go. The last man who cam was sweating profusely. He had clean delicate hands, and a slight build. He was going through this way to get on a free way, alowwing him to get to detroit faster. One of these travelers lied. Who was it?
Torrey was a master art theif. She would steal paintings, then re-sell them. This time, she was going after Picasso. She had been a cleaning lady for the Montag's for months. She cut the screen to the bathroom window, confident it wouldn't be noticed until inversigators did a detailed search. She re-wired the window's security. She slid the painting on a sling, to a flower bed below, on her lunch break.
She made sure to leave her fingerprints on the dorrknobs (she was the cleaning lady after all) but not sink or toilet, because she used gloves. She took a slightly worn man's Nike sneaker
from her bag to make footprints, in hopes of throwing investigators off. She later dropped of the painting, and threw away the sneaker miles away. Even with her careful planning. She made a mistake, that could make her a prime suspect. What was it? Star if you find difficult or interesting please :)
Answer
The man with the ski pole
She cut the screen out ot the womens restroom
The man with the ski pole
She cut the screen out ot the womens restroom
This is a really obvious joke!?
balletdanc
So there was a plane that was flying from Canada to America and the plane crashed on the border. Where do they bury the survivors?
Also i have another joke.
So there was three construction workers, a mexican, white guy, and a polish guy. The mexican opens his lunch and he has a burrito, and he says 'man, if i get another one of these again, i am just going to jump off this building!' and the white guy opens his lunch and he gets a hamburger and he says 'man, if i get another one of these, i am just going to jump off this building!' and the polish guy opens his lunch and he gets a pb&j and he says 'man, if i get another one of these, i am just going to jump off this building' the next day the mexican gets a burrito, so he jumps, the white guy gets a hamburger, and he jumps, and the polish guy gets a pb&j, and he jumps. at the polish guys funeral, the white and the mexican guys' wifes came to see the polish guys wife. the white guys wife said 'why arent you crying?' and she said 'because, he packed his own lunch!'
if anyone has any jokes, i would love to hear them plz!!!
Answer
A woman goes into a store to buy a fishing rod and reel for her grandson's birthday. She doesn't know which one to get, so she just grabs one and goes over to the counter.
The salesman is standing there, wearing dark glasses. She says, Excuse me. Can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?' He says, 'Madam, I'm completely blind; but, if you'll drop it on the counter, I can tell you everything you need to know about it from the sound it makes.' She doesn't believe him but drops it on the counter anyway. He says, 'That's a two metre Shakespeare graphite rod with a Zebco 404 reel and 5-kg test line. It's a good all around combination, and it's on sale this Week for $44.' She says, 'It's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I'll take it!'
As she opens her purse, her credit card drops on the floor. 'Oh, That sounds like a Visa card, says the salesman. As the lady bends down to pick up the card, she accidentally farts. At first she is really embarrassed but then realizes there is no way the blind salesman could tell it was she who had farted.
The salesman rings up the sale and says, 'That'll be $58.50 please.' The woman is totally confused by this and asks, 'Didn't You tell me it was on sale for $44? How did you get to $58.50?'
'The Duck Caller is $11 and the Fish Bait is $3.50.'
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A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her. One of the bags rips and every once in a while a $20 bill falls out onto the sidewalk.
Noticing this, a policeman stops her, and says, "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of your bag."
"Oh, really? Darn!" said the little old lady. "I'd better go back, and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me."
"Well, now, not so fast," says the cop. "How did you get all that money? "You didn't steal it, did you?"
"Oh, no", said the little old lady. "You see, my back yard is right next to the football stadium parking lot. On game days, a lot of fans come and pee through the fence into my flower garden. So, I stand behind the fence with my hedge clippers. Each time some guy sticks his thing through the fence, I say, '$20 or off it comes'.
"Well, that seems only fair" laughs the cop. "OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"
"Well, you know, not everybody pays".
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There was a man who worked all of his life and had saved his money and was a real miser when it came to his money. He loved money more than just about anything.
Just before he died, he said to his wife. "Now listen. When I die, I want you to take all my money and put it in the casket with me. Because I want to take my money to the afterlife with me." And so he got his wife to promise him with all of her heart that when he died, she would put all of the money in the casket with him.
Well one day he died. He was stretched out in the casket, the wife was sitting there in black, and her friend was sitting next to her. When they finished the ceremony, just before the undertakers got ready to close the casket, the wife said, "Wait just a minute!" She had a box with her, she came over with the box and put it in the casket. Then the undertakers locked the casket down, and they rolled it away.
So her friend said, "Girl, I know you weren`t fool enough to put all that money in there with that man." She said, "Listen, I`m a Christian, I can`t lie. I promised him that I was gonna put that money in that casket with him."
"You mean to tell me you put that money in the casket with the man?"
"I sure did," said the wife. "I wrote him a check."
A woman goes into a store to buy a fishing rod and reel for her grandson's birthday. She doesn't know which one to get, so she just grabs one and goes over to the counter.
The salesman is standing there, wearing dark glasses. She says, Excuse me. Can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?' He says, 'Madam, I'm completely blind; but, if you'll drop it on the counter, I can tell you everything you need to know about it from the sound it makes.' She doesn't believe him but drops it on the counter anyway. He says, 'That's a two metre Shakespeare graphite rod with a Zebco 404 reel and 5-kg test line. It's a good all around combination, and it's on sale this Week for $44.' She says, 'It's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I'll take it!'
As she opens her purse, her credit card drops on the floor. 'Oh, That sounds like a Visa card, says the salesman. As the lady bends down to pick up the card, she accidentally farts. At first she is really embarrassed but then realizes there is no way the blind salesman could tell it was she who had farted.
The salesman rings up the sale and says, 'That'll be $58.50 please.' The woman is totally confused by this and asks, 'Didn't You tell me it was on sale for $44? How did you get to $58.50?'
'The Duck Caller is $11 and the Fish Bait is $3.50.'
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A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her. One of the bags rips and every once in a while a $20 bill falls out onto the sidewalk.
Noticing this, a policeman stops her, and says, "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of your bag."
"Oh, really? Darn!" said the little old lady. "I'd better go back, and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me."
"Well, now, not so fast," says the cop. "How did you get all that money? "You didn't steal it, did you?"
"Oh, no", said the little old lady. "You see, my back yard is right next to the football stadium parking lot. On game days, a lot of fans come and pee through the fence into my flower garden. So, I stand behind the fence with my hedge clippers. Each time some guy sticks his thing through the fence, I say, '$20 or off it comes'.
"Well, that seems only fair" laughs the cop. "OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"
"Well, you know, not everybody pays".
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
There was a man who worked all of his life and had saved his money and was a real miser when it came to his money. He loved money more than just about anything.
Just before he died, he said to his wife. "Now listen. When I die, I want you to take all my money and put it in the casket with me. Because I want to take my money to the afterlife with me." And so he got his wife to promise him with all of her heart that when he died, she would put all of the money in the casket with him.
Well one day he died. He was stretched out in the casket, the wife was sitting there in black, and her friend was sitting next to her. When they finished the ceremony, just before the undertakers got ready to close the casket, the wife said, "Wait just a minute!" She had a box with her, she came over with the box and put it in the casket. Then the undertakers locked the casket down, and they rolled it away.
So her friend said, "Girl, I know you weren`t fool enough to put all that money in there with that man." She said, "Listen, I`m a Christian, I can`t lie. I promised him that I was gonna put that money in that casket with him."
"You mean to tell me you put that money in the casket with the man?"
"I sure did," said the wife. "I wrote him a check."
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Title Post: HARD riddles to solve. Who can do it?
Rating: 97% based on 9832 ratings. 4,6 user reviews.
Author: Unknown
Thanks For Coming To My Blog
Rating: 97% based on 9832 ratings. 4,6 user reviews.
Author: Unknown
Thanks For Coming To My Blog
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