Thursday, December 5, 2013

How do I find a true meaning in life?

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chris m


It seems that every day, every week, every month is the same. Wake up at 7, drive to work, come home at 6, eat dinner, do some work at home, watch a little tv at night, go to sleep. Then on the weekends, wake up, do the chores, do all the kid activities (drive them around, watch their games), pay the bills, go to a dinner or lunch party with friends, etc.

It seems that it is always like this. Are we supposed to do this until we die? I just feel like I'm missing something, like there's a meaning that i just can't find. What am i supposed to do?



Answer
This is going to be a long one, I think, so buckle up your safety belt.......to be continued.....

Here it goes......

Some times life can feel a bit like we're on a treadmill in a hamster cage endlessly running and getting nowhere. This feeling usually hit's people just before they are 30.

At 21 we realise that life isn't all going to fall in our laps the way we thought it would.

At 25 we get a bit worried about what the future holds and become aware that we are no longer "young" and nature betrays us by making thick black hairs grow from our nostrils....Nobody warned us about that when we were at school!

At 29 we start to ask questions like the one you've just asked. I did. Everyone does.

I view myself as lucky because I chose to stay single and not have kids. I question this choice frequently and in some ways I envy people like you when I see them getting on with the chores taking the kids out etc. The grass is always greener on the other side.....at least it is in our imaginations.

At 30 I went to India for a few months. I'd been injured at work (I was a prisoner custody officer) and lost my job after 6 months as it had not healed. I had to sell my flat (apartment) and fortunately made enough profit to go travelling. I had the feeling you describe in your question: that it feels as though there is no meaning.

I should have gone to Jerusalem but Ariel Sharon made it all kick off again in the week I sold my flat and I didn't want to put my family through that worry. So I went to India - home of the global fancy dress party. The locals don't hold the party, the tourists do - choosing to try to adopt spirituality by dressing up in the relevant spiritual disguise but for the most part never going beyond appearances.

Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken.

I'd spent my six months off sick from work reading most of the scriptures of the world. While I found a certain ammount of peace after the storm of reading so much spiritual stuff. I still needed to see other things and be in other places.

I see all the things which happen to me as part of a path that opens up before me. Some of it, I choose and some of it is chosen for me. Whatever I do now is a part of the meaning in my life and it is regularly boring, repetative and frustrating - the same as every other human beings.

Have you ever bumped in to something because you weren't looking where you were going? or crasked in to the back of somebody else's car because you were looking at another part of the road instead of where you were driving?

We tend to think that "meaning" exists as an outside entity from ourselves and our lives. That's like hunting round the house looking for a TV signal instead of turning on the TV and tuning in to a channel. The first thing you have to do is turn on the TV in your mind.

Why use the comparison of TV? TV signals are all around us and even pass through us and it's the same with meaning in our lives. It's there but you have to tune in to it.

To tune in you first have to value everything, every moment, either awake or asleep, every mouthful of food, every breath, every bag of rubbish you take out, every person you talk to, every bill you pay, every dinner party, every kids football game, every time you help them with their homework etc.

Then realise that if you do the same thing all the time, at least 50% of the reason for that is because you choose to.

Ask yourself what you would like to do with your spare time and then do it in stead of telling yourself why you can't do it or haven't got time to do it. Look for ways to enable yourself to do the things you want to do instead of looking for the ways to imprison your mind and stop you living your life.

I have no idea what your financial situation is but if the thing holding you back from being free is the nice home, stable job, comfortable sofa and what the neighbours think of you etc., it's time to get rid of those things. Prisons protect you from the outside but they also make you unhappy and stop you going anywhere.

You can't buy happiness or meaning. They're both priceless but they cost nothing and they already exist within you.

There is a funny answer to your question about the meaning and purpose in life. It's in a book called "Scepticism Inc." by Bo Fowler. I'll leave you to find out for yourself. I don't want to spoil it for you.

Films you might like to watch:

American Beauty.
Fight Club.
The Matrix.
Dark City.

and read Scepticism Inc.

It's never painful to be anywhere, it's only painful to wish you were somewhere else.

Now ask yourself: where do you want to be and what do you want to be doing?

If you need specific answers/ help on what to do next, email me through Answers.

P.S. India is NOT now my "spiritual home" nor am I a hindu convert or drug fiend. My faith isn't really an important part of this answer and there is no category of religion that I fit in to. Some would say that I'm "confused"....because they are. Part of your life is your family so whatever you do you have to include them in your ideas and respect their choices.

Please look over and correct my essay for helping to solve hunger in the U.S.?




Bow Down t


This is for project citizen. Our group is working on how to solve hunger in the U.S. Can you look over this essay for gramatical corrections and to see if the problems/solutions in it make sense? Thanks so much!

When people think about the problems that America needs to solve, they mostly think about the economy, obesity, global warming, reducing waste/pollution, etc. One of the things that people are less likely to think about, however, is hunger. Thousands of people out there are trying to put food on their tables, but they have no means of getting the food that their family needs. Itâs not so much about the lack of food then it is getting the money to buy it. You can go into your local grocery store and find 30 different types of canned peaches, but how will you get those canned peaches? By buying them of course!
Well, another problem the starving people have is getting money. So how do the hungry get money? They would need to get a job to make the money. Easier said than done. Most of our jobs are being shipped overseas to India and China and other countries. So how would we get them back? There are many solutions to this problem, but one would be to raise import tariffs and lower export tariffs so importing from other countries are less appealing and exports are more appealing. If exports are more appealing, then we will need people to produce the exports so we can keep up with the demand, thus creating more jobs.
School is also an important factor in helping to solve hunger. Schools can teach kids/parents how to grow fresh fruits and vegetables for food. Growing their own food makes people feel independent. Schools can also teach people career skills that they will need if they go into the work force. For the kids, their local schools can help feed the kidâs breakfast, lunch, and pack bag lunches for the kids for dinner and lunch during the summer.
Another solution lies in the mobility of people that are starving since the land some people live in is unfeasible cultivation wise (in some cases). They have to try to get back into societies where there is an abundance amount of food and where they can be educated and receive more food than you need. The billions of dollars, and much more that can be saved rather than sending food all over the place to them, should go into several programs that will house them temporarily, educate, and train them so they can eventually return to their homes with new skills and educated ideas on how to all build a community that works for them. The solution lies temporarily in mobility of the people to more feasible land.
There is no simple solution to solving one problem. Usually the problems in everyday life converge together. Hopefully sometime in the future, we can create a better world for the next few generations. For now, however, we just have to take it one step at a time and hope for the best.



Answer
'waste/pollution, etc.' - how casual is this essay? (use of etc.)
'Thousands of people out there are trying to put food on their tables, but they have no means of getting the food that their family needs.' - exaggerate, i'm sure there's millions of people in America (depends if you're talking about starving people or not)
'Well, another problem the starving people have is getting money.' - This is virtually the same problem, so you may as well say something like this : 'The root of the problem is getting the money'.
Well i skimmed over the ending part and it looks fairly good, just make sure you sum yourself up in the conclusion and Introduction, so for the intro say what you're talking about etc (i know you already did this) and the conclusion just sum up a bit more and have a more beefy conclusion
i know i did this briefly but it looks good




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